Wednesday, March 9, 2011

is it really THAT important to you?

Once upon a time I belonged to Twitter.  After several months of trying to figure out Twitter's purpose other than a person's would-be Facebook statuses (and I, as a rule, hate Facebook statuses) I deleted my account.  No one cares what I have to say in a pithy 140 character phrase. Of course I could see the benefits of belonging just to have direct access to Charlie Sheen's daily proverbs.  And, apparently, to find out how crazy and upsetting rising stardom can be for Miss Emilie Autumn:
The Best Way To Start Your Day: Noticing this message in Sharpie written across your tour bus, "I waited 5 years to see you and all I wanted was my violin signed." Nice. Allow me to share some details with those moderately interested. We arrive in El Paso, Texas on the morning of the 6th. We spend the whole day preparing the set, the stage, ourselves, rehearsing, soundchecking, etc. 2 hours before the show, I give an hour-long VIP session where I play a violin recital, meet Plague Rats, tell (bad) jokes, sign posters, CDs, and body parts, and pose for pictures with every living breathing thing I can wrap my arms around, one of which freaked the fuck out and started yelling "FUCK YOU!!!" at me as we were being photographed, at which I had to call for security. Then, it's back to the bus for us all to get ready in a panic, because our venue has no dressing room, i.e. backstage. 1 hour later, and we board the stage to perform a sweaty and physically/emotionally draining show just exceeding 2 hours in length. After the show, we rush through the crowd to get to our tour bus so that our small crew can break down the stage as soon as possible and load the trailer in time to get us on the road to the next city in time for tomorrow's show to do the same thing all over again. Fans are waiting outside the bus as the girls and I are inside changing and taking "showers" with baby wipes, and they sometimes pound on the door, but we expect this by now. Our amazing tour manager, Melissa, who tries to take care of every fan and aids me in my desire to give everyone everything they want all the fucking time, comes to the bus to see that we are alright and meets a "Plague Rat" just outside our door. The girl wants her violin signed. I am touched by this -- I always am. Melissa comes in to ask me if I will sign it. I tell her that of course I will as soon as we are changed and ready to meet the girl. Melissa plans to bring her on the bus, which is something we never, ever do, but the girl seems sweet. Melissa asks the girl to wait with her violin outside the bus until she comes back and tells her that I'm ready. You'll never guess what happens next, because I sure couldn't have. Contessa and Maggots are sitting on the couch on one side of the bus, changing out of their costumes. Veronica is sitting on the couch on the other side doing the same. The window behind Tessa and Maggots is open just a crack to let some air in, but that's not all, because, right behind their heads, a long, sharp object is shoved through the window, making stabbing motions and flailing around, just barely missing the backs of their skulls. As far as they know, It could be a gun, a knife, any number of things. VV sees it first -- it's a fucking violin bow. She screams and pulls the girls away from the window, Contessa screams as she is nearly stabbed, and Maggots is just trying to calm them down and make sure nobody is hurt. I am in my bunk, asking what the fuck just happened. The girls are terrified, and I want to kill somebody for this outrageous breach of the tiny personal space we have while on the road and attacking my girls. One of my crew comes to the bus and we inform him of the shit that just went down. He can't even believe it. I ask him if this girl with her violin (and bow apparently) is still waiting outside our bus. He looks out and says that she is. I ask him to let her know that she needs to step away immediately, because no one will be signing anything tonight. She was as good as on the bus, her violin was as good as signed, and all she had to do was wait until we were changed, but this wasn't enough for her, and she had to come up to our window, find an open crack, and shove her bow inside, and now, she needs to leave. It's over. She ruined it. Good night. So, when Melissa comes to me first thing this morning with the new the aforementioned message was scrawled in permanent ink all along the side of our bus that night (which I now need to pay to have removed because this bus is rented -- I do not own this), I ask myself again why I even bother. To this girl, and to other "fans" such as this, of which there are, sadly, MANY, thank you for once again reminding me that you are entitled to everything, I am obligated to give you everything, that my personal space is nothing, that your petty wishes are all that matters and that, if they are not fulfilled to the last detail, my personal property, or that which I rent, may be destroyed in an act of obviously justified revenge. Thanks for making me, once again, consider just saying "Fuck this," and going home. And thanks for ruining it for everybody else, whom I now will not trust within a mile of my bus, my girls, myself, or anything I hold dear (or have to pay for). So, for any true Plague Rats or simply decent human beings who see such acts as this being committed, you know what to do. To any who see this girl posting about the cruelty of myself and my crew for not allowing her fucking violin to be signed, you know what to do. But the true tragedy of my morning? That my gluten free oatmeal just exploded all over the bus microwave. Now THAT sucks...
 I'm not sure that there's much to say, except- WHAT'S WRONG WITH PEOPLE?

About the girl with the violin- Emilie Autumn isn't God.  She's a great performer, but not that much more special than anyone else on this planet.  She doesn't have to fulfill everyone's requests.  She is human.  That is why I don't flatter myself by thinking that she's actually reading this blog even though I gave her the address.  I wish she would,  I wish everyone would read my blog and inflate my nonexistent ego.  I also wish that I was the one marrying Prince William, much to my boyfriend's insistence that Harry is the better catch because his brief stint fighting with the British Army in Afghanistan in 2007 has truly turned him into a warrior prince.  But I digress.

My point is, if EA went about pleasing every one of her fans personally she's die of exhaustion in two days.  No celebrity is that important that you have to lose your senses over them.  Destruction of property is just not cool.  If you really want EA's attention, then pay the extra money to attend the VIP sessions and meet her in person.  She'll sign your violin there.  

The "FUCK YOU" girl just baffles me.  Didn't she know she was going to get hugged?

Despite everything that went wrong with the Pittsburgh concert, I am so glad that the fans were as mellow as they were (except for the girl who lied to Veronica on her poster just to get kissed during the Sexy Rat Game- I overheard her tell a group of Plague Rats after the concert that she lied about it being her 18th birthday to get Veronica's attention. Come on.  As a Plague Rat do you really need to deceive to get such special attention when there were plenty of other deserving Plague Rats in the crowd?)  The only fierce passion shown was the fact that we were freezing our arses out in zero degree weather, which I think is more of a "survival instinct" passion and rather understandable, compared to "Waah, Emilie Autumn won't give me immediate special attention and personal gratification, waah."  Just enjoy the music and her message of "I'm depressed, you're depressed, let's forget about the depression through my expression of those depressed feelings."

Now I feel really bad about making Emilie Autumn cry.  Sounds like she is going to need serious mental help after everything her fans have done to distress her during this tour.

6 comments:

  1. Did you like her "HOW DARE YOU ASK FOR FREE TICKETS?! EVERYBODY MAKES MORE MONEY THAN I DO! I /LOSE/ MONEY TOURING AND I DO IT BECAUSE I LOVE TO!" tweet?

    On topic: yeah, that girl was rude. She shouldn't have done that. I actually can find no reason she would, and therefore must say that maybe Emilie isn't telling the 100% truth... it's happened before... the potentially killer bow and Sharpie was really rude, though.

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  2. Oh god...I'm disgusted. Seriously, like...I'm almost feeling ill. God I wish I could give Emilie a hug, not because as one of my idols it would be a nice experience, but because the poor girl bloody sounds like she needs one!

    Makes me feel guilty just for screaming at concerts, even at appropriate times :P

    I NEVER go looking for bands after concerts. Firstly because I can't stand the thought of looking like some ridiculous desperate fan and two I can just imagine how irritating it must get for them to be followed around all the time. I mean if you've just worked your arse off on stage for hours the last thing you wanna do is deal with pesky little fan girls.


    This is seriously so depressing. I'm ashamed to be human.

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  3. Ashlee- I did like that tweet of hers. :) Also, I did wonder whether EA was not telling the whole truth as well. If EA isn't telling the 100% truth, what do you think happened?

    I wondered if it may have been someone else who was doing the stupid motions with the violin bow (but that's going with the mental scene in my head that there was a mob of fans outside the bus.) But it's also possible that that fan may not have been told yet that she was going to come onto the bus and got impatient-which still doesn't make what EA said about her behavior any more excusable.

    Green Fairy- Don't be ashamed to be human. You didn't do the stupid actions. Never take guilt for things you yourself cannot control. One thing that no one can control- the actions of others.

    I hate looking like a desperate fan as well. Hence why I am sad for making EA cry at the VIP event in Pittsburgh- was I really an attention-whore like the violin girl mentioned in the tweet above?

    I'm sure EA would greatly appreciate that hug from someone who obviously cares.

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  4. Yes I know, but I feel like I need to do something about it, but I fear by attempting to (which I assume my efforts would be in email or some such text medium) I'm only confounding the problem by yet adding more and more fan related baggage for her to deal with.

    Sigh. Silly nutters.

    Oh science no, you're nothing like her! I think there's a massive difference between wanting to convey the reasons why she's a woman after your own heart with a few sweet words than shaking her make-shift home in an attempt to storm the place, and when that fails making attempts to impale the inhabitants of said home and then defaming it's exterior.

    God, the more I think about it the more angry I get about it. I think I need a cup of tea.

    *toddles off to brew a fresh pot*

    Oh and I'm glad you think so ^_^

    I hope this doesn't turn her off touring. Sigh, well at least if it does I'm very grateful I got to see her at least once.

    <3

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  5. Hmm... maybe Emilie did meet the girl and it didn't go well. So the girl Sharpied her bus. Emilie doesn't want to be at fault for it though so she left that part out. So that she could be the victim in it all.

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  6. Ashlee- That is a really good explanation that fits in with the Sharpie incident. I never even considered that POV.

    Thanks for reminding me to not be so biased. :)

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